I have not always struggled with anxiety. In fact, if you had asked me several years ago if that term held any personal meaning for me, I would have said no. However, after my daughter’s autism diagnosis in February 2020, things began to shift. You see, I had a very difficult time processing my grief that stemmed from that world-shifting diagnosis, and I would soon find that what I was emotionally and mentally holding in, would affect my physical being in the form of intense anxiety and panic attacks.
Mental health was once a taboo subject that no one felt comfortable discussing. Over time, however, it has been thrust into the spotlight and has become a hot-button topic that everyone seems to agree is extremely important to our overall health, and should be part of public discourse. I would wholeheartedly agree with this. Although it is easy to say mental health is important, it is still difficult, I feel, to be vulnerable enough to open up and speak honestly about your own personal struggles in this area. But that is exactly what I intend to do with you, friend. Trust me when I say this has not been an easy piece to write, as I have come up against obstacle after obstacle to get words on paper, but my heart is that God would allow my experiences to help someone else who may be in the same spot. Our pain and hardships are never without purpose!
Following my daughter, Emma’s, autism diagnosis, I very much struggled with the loss of control that I felt, and the dreams that I had for her that seemed to come crashing down around me. I could only see everything that I thought she would never be capable of. Countless tears, countless nights of lost sleep, and that idea of hope that I desperately wanted seemed just beyond my grasp. The anxiety began to set in. I suddenly started experiencing panic attacks that I had never in my life gone through. Several of these happened in the car, which led me to avoid wanting to get in my vehicle and drive anywhere. I would break out in stress-induced rashes across my back and along my face. As I said, what you hold in will find a way out. Things looked dark. It was as if a switch had been pulled and I had no idea how to turn it off.
Three years into this journey, here is what I can tell you. Mental health does not exist in a vacuum. It is intricately woven with our emotional, spiritual, and physical health. God designed us so wonderfully that every part of our being is drawn to Him, and it is only through deep relationship with Him that we are able to thrive. There are several pieces that I have learned over this difficult season that make it more manageable as I wait for the Lord to lead me from it.
Talk to Someone
Thank goodness my husband cared enough about me to push me to see a counselor. When we are hurting, it can be difficult to open up and share that hurt with someone else. We don’t want to be seen as weak, or unable to handle our own lives. For me, I felt a lot of shame as I saw myself crumbling as a wife and mother under the weight of debilitating anxiety. I am here to tell you today, that a little vulnerability on your part can change your life. Isolation is one of the worst things we can do to ourselves when our mental health is on the decline—I am saying that as a tried and true introvert! I needed a counselor to help me process my grief, understand how to help my mind when I went into panic mode, and assist me in shifting my perspective from everything that Emma may not do, to everything that she can achieve! I was the one putting limitations on her, not the Lord. After all, God has the ultimate say, and I truly believe with all my heart that He has great plans for my girl (Jeremiah 29:11). We have a wonderful counseling center right here at Bay Life that is available to you. Don’t let your pride stand in the way of what God is wanting to do in your life through the encouragement of another Christ follower. I also think it is important to note that if you find yourself still struggling after speaking with a professional, there is no shame in talking to your family physician about how you are feeling.
Move
Your mental health is tightly connected to your physical self. When I feel a rise in my anxiety level, it always helps me to move my body. I will walk, bike, or throw on the Just Dance game on my son’s Switch and we will dance it out together. Think about it, don’t you tend to feel worse when you are sedentary and your body isn’t getting proper movement? Get outside, get your heart rate up, and throw on some music as you do it. Nine times out of ten, I can ease the uptick in anxiety with exercise, and I would almost bet this would be beneficial for you as well.
Get in the Word and Prayer
The most important piece of the puzzle is your relationship with Jesus. It is crucial to be in God’s Word every.single.day. Jesus is your lifeline, and He has so much to say about fear and the focus of our minds. I get that we have a lot of things fighting for our attention throughout the day, often from when we wake up until our heads hit the pillow, but if you feel like there isn’t time for your Bible, you’ve got to make the time!
One of my go-to verses that I always read and think about is Philippians 4:6-8 which reads, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.”
I also love the YouVersion Bible app. There are so many reading plans across a variety of topics. I just checked, and I completed twenty-six reading plans last year. I don’t say that to “toot my own horn”, but to show you how desperately I need to hear God’s voice each day. Some plans were longer than others, and not all had to do with tackling anxiety, but just being in God’s word daily is such an intricate component of having a calm and peaceful mind.
Finally, you need to know that God loves you. He cares for you and the hardships and pain you are experiencing are not lost on Him. Go to Him in prayer. Talk to your heavenly Father. He wants you to cast your cares on Him (1 Peter 5:7). Don’t ever feel that your struggle is too large for God or that He doesn’t see you. He knit you together and knows the number of hairs on your head (Psalm 139)! There is not a day that has gone by or one that will come, that He has not seen. Your hurting heart matters to Him. Never doubt that. And when you don’t feel like you can carry the burden anymore, He will carry you.
I have faith that this hard season with anxiety will one day be a thing of my past, but until then, I am asking God to teach me what He wants me to learn while in the struggle, clinging to Him for dear life as I walk through it.
*I have included some of my favorite verses pertaining to what God says about fear, anxiety, and hope. I am also including one of the best reading plans on how to combat anxiety with a strong biblical perspective—it is excellent!
- Psalm 73:28
- Proverbs 3:5-6
- John 16:33
- Deuteronomy 31:6
- Isaiah 41:10
- Joshua 1:9
- John 14:27
- Romans 8:28
You Version Bible Plan: The 7-Day Anxiety Detox: Practical Tips for Biblically Overcoming Anxiety by Brittney Moses.